Before attending this year’s
Conference on College Men at Miami University in Oxford, Ohio, I attended the
two previous CCMs at Indiana University Purdue University-Indianapolis and the University
of Pennsylvania. This cross-disciplinary
conference focusing on the topic of college men was created by a collaboration
between NASPA and ACPA members interested in creating a space to dialogue about
challenges facing college men. With each new conference iteration every two
years, an unofficial conference theme emerges. This year’s thematic subtext
highlighted the psychological toll entailed with one’s conformity to
traditional male gender roles. Though many of the conference presentations
focused on disparate college male populations and their respective experiences,
a common topic surfaced regarding the theoretical and pragmatic implications of
addressing young men’s emotional livelihood, as well as the internal emotional
world of those practioners who develop and implement programs designed
specifically around gender and masculinities.
As individuals who work in higher
education and who are devoted to the success of college men, we too, have been
affected by hegemonic masculinity (for better or worse). Throughout formal
conference sessions and informal settings at meals, conversations amongst
conference attendees entailed discussions of how to create and sustain a
healthier model of masculinity for the young men with whom we work. It is my contention
that in order to realize this new vision on our campuses, we have to appreciate
and address the ways in which our own male socialization impacts personal and
professional relationships. While attending CCM, I witnessed and was apart of
such discussions, which I hope to depict here with my conference
reflections.
Starting with Carlos Gomez’s
opening keynote address / performance, he cited his own developmental path of
defining and refining his sense of self as a gendered being. By also
acknowledging the intersections of his racial / ethnic and class social group
identity memberships, he created a lens with which he described the broadening of
his emotional landscape. Specifically, he spoke about complimenting anger, as the
only “acceptable” expression of negative affect, with identification of sadness
and fear. Later in the conference, the other featured speaker, Dr. Robert
Heasley, gave a unique talk masculine gender performance and sexuality. He
spoke on the need for further fluidity of masculine self-expression beyond “the
binary” and rigid notions of gender presentation. In addition, he suggested
that hetero-normative and heterosexist ideology regarding men’s relationships
has hampered their abilities to create open and expressive male connections.
The real strength of the conference
was the concurrent sessions that incorporated varied views on college men seen
today on our campuses. I was fortunate to have the opportunity to bring in the
aforementioned theme of suboptimal psychological functioning with an analysis
of current unconscious and conscious racial and sexist oppression. During my
talk I hoped to illustrate the manifestation of race and gender as requisites
for White male entitlement, privilege, and the related psychological costs of
privilege within racism and sexism. After presenting my conceptualization of this
phenomenon, I facilitated an active discussion on its impact related to student
affairs practioners working with White college men. I left the discussion
humbled by hearing from so many audience members and their tireless work with
this unique demographic. I was equally excited about the numerous direct
interventions yet to be created and implemented on behalf of White college men.
I attended engaging presentations
on intersectionality of identity existing for college men (including veteran,
Latino, gay, Black, and other identities). I also attended an innovative
program about outreach, another on the creative utilization of Motivational
Interviewing (MI), and finally one a comprehensive plan for developing a
retreat for college men.
As if the formal keynotes and
sessions did not provide enough “food for thought” on the lived experience of
today’s college man, getting the chance to build relationships with other male
conference attendees during informal down time greatly supplemented my
experience. Getting to sit with a racially diverse group of men and hear about
how they experienced their individual male development was a conference
highlight. Together, we reflected on our sexual development and identity (both
gay and straight). We spoke about our expanded emotional expression, especially
to important male figures. In particular, we shared our understanding and
meaning surrounding our first articulation of, “I love you,” to our fathers. We
collectively opened up to each other (essentially as strangers) in the spirit
of the conference’s re-visioning of healthy masculinities and it’s positive
effects on the college men with whom we work.
Dr. Benjamin Neale is a postdoctoral fellow at the University of Illinois Chicago Counseling Center. In his position, he performs psychotherapy with UIC undergraduate and graduate students. He can be reached via email at bhneale@uic.edu
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